Can't See

I think it's a function of being tired--and of spending too much time reading (and forgetting to wear my reading glasses: I'm still not used to the idea that they help). I probably should stay and work some more tonight, but since I literally am having a hard time seeing (feels like there's a veil over my right eye), I think I'll pack it in. Oddly, when I checked in to the main blog page a minute ago, a post that I put up last night seems to have vanished--and yet I'm pretty sure it was there, as Sara (dear friend and colleague) mentioned something this morning that suggested she'd seen/read it. Hmmm. Maybe it will reappear when I post this. Anyway, classes went pretty well. Mr. "I'll Bring My Gun" from 229 finally got the idea and dropped today. Another student officially withdrew, much to my regret--she was great (but she seems to be interested in taking Nature in Lit next semester, which would be terrific). A few more have simply racked up too many absences, and I don't think they'll be back (and another 1-2 are on the verge of serious trouble in the attendance department). Yet another student was making noises about dropping, but he was overreacting (not focusing on the fact that he can revise his papers, thought he was already in grade trouble because of attendance, when in fact he isn't), so I think I persuaded him to stay. Still, I think we're down to about 14--which would be 50% attrition. I don't much like that, but it happens--and not just to me, even to some of the gentler and less-demanding professors. In any event, since the class is now that small, instead of group work, from now on we'll do our discussions in a circle: everyone has to ask a question or make a comment. It went well today--even the smirking couple asked legitimate questions and seemed to be paying attention to the answers. (I also caught a cute moment between them that made me laugh. I didn't say anything to the rest of the class, but Miss Smirk and I exchanged a few smiles over it. I don't think I've broken any ice there, but it may have persuaded her that I am not entirely monstrous--despite the rigor of my assignments.) In 101 the students mostly churned away at putting together the logic of a rather complex essay they'd read--and did pretty well at it. I spent the time trying to figure out their groups. I have a rough idea, but I need to do further adjusting: I'm aiming not only for gender balance but also for minimal negative impact from the lumps--which is harder, in part because some of the lumps want to work together and in part because some of the other students specifically asked not to work with the lumps. I am very careful to ensure that people aren't working with someone they specifically asked to avoid--but unfortunately I won't be able to be as accommodating in making sure they work with exactly the group-mates they requested. I was very interested to see a definite gender divide in the requests: the girls wanted to work only with other girls, the guys mostly only with other guys. Very few crossed the gender divide in their requests. I wonder how much of that is a hold-over from the hormonal difficulties and confusions of junior high and high school. (Um, showing my regional roots there--or possibly a time thing, but here and now it's called "middle school," not junior high.) It truly seems odd to me, so I'm wondering what accounts for that divide. Apart from that, I cranked through some P&B business and a bunch of that antique 101RB homework, though a few bits are still left for tomorrow a.m., prior to my meeting. First meeting, I should say: it's another meeting/class/meeting/class day, no break from 11:30 to 5:15. Not sure how early I'll be able to drag my fanny out of bed, either: I originally intended to get up at 6 today, so I'd have that extra hour to get stuff done--and changed my mind before I even went to bed (later than I'd intended, of course). I also feel a bit like I'm coming down with something (scratchy throat, muzzy head--though that could just be lingering effects of yesterday's headache), so definitely early to bed tonight, and maybe not early to rise tomorrow. We'll see. I'm playing everything by ear these days (very playful ears I have, apparently). So far, the improvisational technique is working--and the stress levels have definitely receded to much more manageable levels. Whew.