The good, the bad--no ugly

I find that my days are pretty evenly split--and, fortunately, tend to end on good notes. Monday and Wednesday: unresponsive 102 followed by 265, which is a blast. Tuesday and Thursday: rapidly unraveling 101 followed by a 102 that is at least lively--thanks in part to a couple of the men in the class, who will talk with vigor and at least sufficient intelligence about nearly anything.

So, despite the fact that I intended to walk from class directly to my car (with only a brief stop in the office to fling down the class folder I'd be carrying with me), I decided to blog a minute before heading home. Part of the reason to blog here and now is because, today at least, I do not want to have even a whiff of work in the apartment. (I am in desperate need of a recharge, which means being at home doing the Scarlett O'Hara/sea cucumber impression until an early bedtime tonight.) The other reason for writing here/now is because the day is fresh in my mind, and it was fun.

I grant you, in 265 there are a couple of students, still apparently hanging in there, who probably won't make it to the end. There are now three young women in the class who have been having problems getting work in and who are struggling to hold it together long enough and well enough to end the semester with something approaching the kind of grade they'd like (or even just to get to the end at all). But the upside is that two of the young men are very vocal and smart--and a number of the young women (including some of the ones in potential trouble) are somewhat less aggressive but responsive and crackerjack bright nonetheless. Sitting in the circle makes things relaxed and low-pressure. Today I talked to them about some of the wilder critical responses to the poems; I did very quick research, turned up a few analyses of some of the Williams and Stevens poems, and was both fascinated and amused by the variety of approaches and takes on the material (some of which I copied for them). Some of the analyses were way out there--and to my mind, pretty idiotic and unfounded in the actual words of the poem (but then, I do not profess to be a specialist). The students also were amused--and seemed to be relieved that I personally favor a less overwrought approach, particularly to the Williams poems. Great stuff going on in our discussions. One said, "I thought we were your favorite class." They are. They're delightful.

I also had another moment that drew on my compassion today: a student showed up for 102 after six absences. According to my attendance policy, that's withdraw or fail time. However, she did have a note testifying to the fact that she'd been hospitalized for a while. My policy is that the reason for the absence does not matter, only the fact of the absence--but she desperately wants to complete the course. So, as I did for the student in yesterday's 102, I'm giving her the same chance under the same conditions: if she completely, utterly toes the line from now until the last day of class, I'll give her the incomplete so she has a chance. Apparently she has finally gotten serious about her education--but is, at the moment, on the edge of academic dismissal because she's withdrawn from too many classes and screwed up too many times. And she's smart as hell. Her contributions to today's class discussion were among the best--and her presence (and intelligent, confident responses) enhanced the overall class dynamic so it was less flat and flabby than it's been.

I suppose if I had to sum up my overall philosophy about student chances, it is that I will give a lot of slack to a student who seems to have sufficient intelligence, drive, and skill to make it. I will be helpful to the ones who have drive, even lacking the intelligence and/or skill, though I won't devote quite as much time or energy to them. Intelligence without drive drives me batshit, and I come down extremely hard on those students. Skill without intelligence I have no patience for--unless the student is willing to work on the quality of his or her responses. If the student is content with pabulum, I tend to dismiss him or her pretty sharply. (Speaking of which, I ran across the snotty smirking student from last semester's 229 today, and she looked daggers at me. I had a brief flash of a desire to rip into her, just to try to get through, but then--within a nanosecond--dismissed her. I hope she gets the rude awakening she deserves, but it doesn't have to come from me.) All in all, my rules can be flexible--and my compassion is most evident for the students I consider worth the energy that compassion requires. I don't think students are aware of this, but when we give them extra chances and extensions on deadlines and guidance--everything we do to make things easier for them--it's harder for us. Doing so takes not only additional time but additional intellectual and emotional energy (and, in my case, additional organizational skills that are somewhat lacking under the best of circumstances). But I'll do it, and gladly, for a student who might benefit from the chance. Sometimes they still manage to hang themselves, which is a shame--and I'm a lot more willing than I used to be to allow the negative consequences to play out, even for the students I truly want to help--but when that extra chance can turn things around for a student, I am immensely gratified.

And now I'm immensely hungry and tired. Homeward bound.