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Thursday, March 19, 2015

yet another small-scale miracle

I've not been feeling well today, and I was very tempted to set work aside and read for my own amusement, not to accomplish anything academic (or even requiring much in the way of intelligence). But I thought, "Oh, you'll feel happier if you do at least a little work"--and I did.

I finished all the critical material I have downloaded.

Now, before we get hasty and start the wild celebrations, let me note that I still have eight articles in print (in a book I own) and two articles and one book that I'm hoping to receive by interlibrary loan--but I can see the light at the end of this particular tunnel.

This is fortunate, because this morning I'm feeling antsy about running out of time: I know that once I turn my attention to the novel itself, I still have mountains to move--not to mention a lot more work on the various bits I've been working on sporadically to this point, and one significant chapter that I haven't begun to address. (Socio-historical context. Blech.) But if I can whack out the rest of the critical material before the end of next week--and I may even be able to do it faster than that--then I can move on to other things.

I realize, too, that I'm doing a pretty good job of letting go of each day once it's over: If I didn't get enough work done yesterday, oh well. All I need to focus on is whether I feel OK about today. And I do feel OK about today, because anything is better than the nothing I originally anticipated.

Full confession, though: I might have gotten even more done if I hadn't suddenly thought, "Oh, yeah, I should mention Le Guin's web site somewhere," and then I visited it, and started reading her posts about her cat and politics and the state of publishing... and oops: the siren call of distraction. But she is such a terrific writer, and thinker, and I love her humor, which sometimes is manifest even when she's being most fierce.

In any event, the ooky feeling I've been fighting all day is still with me, so at this point, I am going to revert to my original plan and lie down to vegetate. Tomorrow I'll be working at the coffee cafe again, assuming the ooks go away by then (and I assume they will). It was lovely to spend a day home today. It will be lovely to spend a day not home tomorrow.

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