Serious panic attack

So, bad news is, Nature in Lit was indeed canceled: I got word today. The somewhat good news is that, because I talked to Bruce (and because he's very sweet to me), I did not get another comp: I got Modern Poetry--but that meant switching me out of one of my sections of 102, and I got a 101 instead. I don't much like spring 101s (students fall in 3 varieties: 1, just got out of remediation; 2, failed 101 in the fall; 3, applied to NCC so late that they missed fall semester, none of which would be one's choice of motivated, skilled students to work with)--but it beats hell out of four comps. I feel somewhat bad for the two students from my 101s who signed up for my section of 102: I e-mailed them today to tell them that they won't, in fact, have me for their teacher after all. I don't think it will hurt them to have a different professor (always good to have a variety), but I will miss them--especially one of them, who will do great in 102. I just hope whoever gets the 102 is good, as those students deserve a great experience.

But now I'm in a flat-out panic to pull together readings for the Modern Poetry class (265). I've taught it before--under the exact same circumstance--so I thought, "No problem, I'll just pull up the syllabus I used last time." Oops, problem: last time, I didn't actually prep any readings: I just said "reading due" and made it up week by week--and like an idiot, I didn't keep track of what I assigned. It worked pretty well last time, but damn, I wish I'd made a note of it, so I wouldn't have to reinvent that particular wheel.

And in terms of 101, I want to reconfigure some of the assignments--including doing different readings from what I've been doing the last six thousand times I've taught the class. I used to use a different first reading, which I think I'll go back to: it is about how our experiences in different places change how we read, write and think, rather than being about the need for wild places. I think that will fly better with the students--but then I want to do the whole first thematic block using similar readings, heading into their first paper, and that will require some juggling. I may go back to doing an in-class midterm and final (timed writing is an important skill)--and I may completely refocus the preliminary research project.... I'm just thinking to myself here, but as I think about this, a voice in my head is saying, "and I have exactly 9 days to pull it all together--for both 101 and 265." The panic swells to epic proportions.

Especially because I also don't want to start giving up some of my fun stuff just yet: I rode today, and I fully intend to do a double dance class tomorrow, followed by dinner with Kristin (whom I haven't seen all break). And I intend to see Szilvia on Wednesday--unless by that time the panic has built so much I truly won't be able to enjoy it (which is possible). So that means I have to get onto the early to bed and early to rise thing as of tomorrow, or I truly will be insane next weekend.

Because of course I also have to work on the promo folder, which is due the day we start classes.

Meanwhile, the task is to do something to relax enough tonight that I can sleep instead of sitting here feeling like I'm plugged into a socket. I know it is a bad idea to try to work (if I do, I really won't get to sleep), but until I feel like at least one of these tasks is somewhat under control, I'm just going to be tied in knots.

Shifting gears, however, on the very good news front: a book review I did for an online journal is getting published (book reviews for this kind of publication are done on spec, and for no pay, just for the prestige of being tapped to do it--so there is never any guarantee that the work will actually be seen). When I submitted it, I knew it was way longer than they usually like--and I said I'd be happy to cut, if they'd suggest where--but it seems, from a cursory glance, to have been published intact, even long as it is. Extremely cool beans. And of course, that goes into the promo folder... If you're interested, you can check it out at http://greentheoryandpraxis.org/journal/index.php/journal/article/view/88/88.

I already had a huge dinner and a drink out at one of my favorite places (on my way home from my ride: this is a Friday routine), but I'm thinking perhaps another drink won't hurt. I hardly ever have more than one, but the winged elephants in my tummy indicate that I need some serious tranquilizers. Bourbon or scotch will do.