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THINGS HAVE CHANGED:

Since I am no longer a professor in the classroom, this blog is changing focus. (I may at some future date change platforms, too, but not yet). I am now (as of May 2019) playing around with the idea of using this blog as a place to talk about the struggles of writing creatively. Those of you who have been following (or dipping in periodically) know that I've already been doing a little of that, but now the change is official. I don't write every day--yet--so I won't post to the blog every day--yet. But please do check in from time to time, if you're interested in this new phase in my life.


Hi! And you are...?

I am interested to see the fluctuation in my readers--but I don't know who is reading the blog, how you found it, and why you find it interesting. I'd love to hear from you! Please feel free to use the "comment" box at the end of any particular post to let me know what brought you to this page--and what keeps you coming back for more (if you do).





Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Relief

Blogging early today, largely because I feel I need to be doing something and yet feel unable to be very productive right now. Slept well last night (thank you, whatever gods may be!), woke up before the alarm but not by much and felt rested enough that it was not agonizing. However, I did wake up with a headache (win some, lose some). I have that pretty well under control at the moment (thank you, Excedrin!)--and despite a moment of cowardice as I lay in bed, in which I thought, "OK, well, I slept, but I do have a headache, so I could still cancel classes...," I got myself here and taught a decent class this morning. The students were utterly unfazed by the lack of returned papers and consequent postponement (again) of the revision due date. I went over the final assignment with them, so those who want to start work on it (who want more than the week between revision and proposal) know what to work on. Over the next few weeks, I'll keep asking them if they have questions, checking in to make sure they feel like they know what they need to do. But it's on them if they have concerns. If they don't ask, I won't explain any further than I already have.

I spent a little time doing grammar review, arising from their homework for today. I could have kept going, but I could feel their attention starting to wane, so I put them in groups to work on their understanding of the novel. They seem to be doing a little better, though of course, I'd be happier if they were digging into a deeper level of understanding instead of just trying to get the basics. Ah well. I did not leave the groupings to random chance but carefully selected them, and I liked the selection. I may stick with those groups for the rest of the semester. Something to think about.

I don't have a lot of enthusiasm for the poetry class today. I'm not wild about the poems (assigned because they are culturally significant, period), but the students did a pretty damned good job with what we went over on Monday, so maybe they'll do most of the heavy lifting today. One can hope.

But speaking of that class, I got an e-mail this morning from a student, frantic about his difficulties writing the paper that was due on Monday, not asking for help, necessarily, just for a little impulsion from me to get him going. (My response was, in essence, "breathe, stop stressing yourself out, write something--anything--and bring that in. We'll figure it out from there.") What struck me about the e-mail, however, was the "voice" in it, which is powerfully reminiscent of the voice in e-mails from other intelligent young male students. It's a voice I find quite charming, actually: a rather brilliant stream of consciousness muscular struggle, filled with determination and angst in equal measure. I love working with students like that. All their confusion and bewilderment comes out of a desire to do well, to grapple in a significant way with the material, and man, that is just heaven. I'll take that stew any time over smoothly written and organized specious trivialities (boring boring boring--and maddeningly shallow, lacking in anything passing even vaguely for thought). I suspect that this young man--like the former student who called me recently to ask for advice--is finding that he has a class that makes him take himself seriously as a student, and as that is new to him, he has to figure out how to do that. I look forward to seeing him in class today, to talking with him after.

And now that I've given myself time on marking the revisions, I am happily looking forward to writing up the classroom observation from last week, setting up interviews with potential adjuncts, doing other P&B business. (That's Personnel and Budget, Sam, in case you read this before I have a chance to respond to your e-mail.) It will feel good to get my feet clear of that. I may even have a chance to write up tomorrow's observation tomorrow, which would be delicious: then I can cross that whole category off my "to do" list.

I do have to be careful, however, not to get so relaxed about the revision reprieve that I put them off too long again and find myself next week in the exact same hole. I know I'll be doing umpty-ump plagiarism checks (murmph, rowr, bazz-fazz, to use Pogo-isms), but well, there it is. At least I don't feel frantic about the time that will take, annoyed though I am about the need to do it.

And it is a spectacularly gorgeous, sunny day. That brightens a mood no matter what else may be going on. I love the longer days, the warmer temps, the increasing incidence of sunshine, the spreading green. Distracting as hell, but purely beautiful.

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